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Conquer Termites’ Annual Golf Championship

The month of September is a great time for footy fans in Australia. But a little known sporting event was also held on Friday, 27 September, the Annual Conquer Termites Golf Championship. The competition was again played over nines holes at the Bulimba Three Par Course . This course is the ideal arena for the level of golf normally on offer.

To spice things up and get the competitive juices going it was decided to run a “Headwear” competition amongst the 8 competitors. Like all off field competitions, all the members rose to the occasion and deck themselves out in some outlandish headwear. It could be suggested that some were expressing their inner soul. Eventual winner, Joel Mitchell, was selected for his original portrayal of Walt White, “Heisenberg”, from the very popular TV series “Breaking Bad” (Joel is the third from the right). New team member, Alex Koklas and Al Ferguson were chosen to be the least attractive members in headwear. Last years winner, Andy Clarklin,  was disappointed not to be selected this year with his very impressive “Carnival” headwear.

The Conquer Player before the match off

The Conquer Player before the match off

After the initial banter about who should have really won and who really look good in their headwear, the serious game of golf began. It must be pointed out that the only serious part of the game for the Conquer players is to sabotage the player(s) that have any skill in the fine art of swinging a golf club. Loud noise, inappropriate remarks and flying objects are all tolerated in the pursuit of cutting down the tall poppy.

Championship golf cards

But like all the last three championships, the cream finds a way to rise to the top – champions push through adversity. It appears that we might have two Champions this year in incumbent, David Bell and Dan Kemp on even scores. There seems to be some confusion in the final scores as both players invoked the minus two stroke rule if a bottle of beer was consumed between holes tournament rule. The judicator committee will meet on Tuesday to announce the eventual winner.

One outcome that is not in dispute is the naming of the Champion Billiards pair of Joel & Rowan. After a fierce knockout round at the Colmslie Hotel, the pair were undefeated. Rowan would like to say that his victory was solely based on his selection of a brilliant partner (who was fairly sober) and nothing much more than that.

A great afternoon for team bonding and new opportunities to create stories on how good everyone’s’ sporting ability was, or wasn’t!

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